INTERRACIAL DATING

Filipino Women Dating an AFAM: She’s a Filipina, of Course…

Sunday Jimenez
3 min readMay 6, 2024
A woman posing for the camera.
Photo by Jed Jone on Pexels

The rise of Filipino women dating an AFAM (a slang term in the Philippines for foreign men) shows how cultures are mixing more and more.

For some Filipinas, marrying someone from another country means a chance for a better life. For others, it’s finding a real connection they haven’t found from someone in their homeland.

But it’s not always easy. Filipinas face stereotypes and challenges, both from their own communities and from society in general.

Let’s hop on the “of course” trend, made popular on TikTok, and share and debunk some stereotypes about Filipino women dating foreigners.

She’s a Filipina, of course…

…She’s a gold digger!

Who hasn’t heard the one about Filipino women dating an AFAM being called gold diggers? This stereotype may be due to misconceptions about poverty in the Philippines and assumptions about women seeking financial security.

However, this unfairly overlooks the fact that many Filipinas prioritize genuine relationships and value emotional connection over material wealth.

Truth be told, she’s financially savvy and values stability. While she knows the importance of financial security, she also values genuine connections and meaningful relationships over material wealth.

…She’s exotic

Foreigners love exotic beauty, they say. Some foreign men prefer tanned-skin Filipinas. But Filipina beauty is rooted in the country’s history of being a melting pot of cultures.

The Philippines has been influenced by various cultures, resulting in a diverse range of physical features that are often considered exotic by Western standards.

She can be a blend of indigenous, Spanish, Chinese, and American, among others. Hence, she may not exude that exotic beauty some expect her to have.

…She’s an opportunist

This stereotype may arise from misunderstandings about Filipinas seeking opportunities abroad or in relationships.

In reality, many Filipinas are resourceful and seize opportunities to improve their lives and the lives of their families, demonstrating resilience and determination.

She’s not often dependent on her foreign partner. She will find a way to work and earn her own money.

…She’s uneducated

People assume that Filipino women dating in the Philippines are uneducated, and that’s why they seek foreign men. They ignore the many highly educated and accomplished women who choose to date foreign men because of bad experiences with Filipino men.

While access to education can be a challenge for some, many — in fact, most — Filipinas value education and work hard to pursue academic and personal development.

She recognizes the importance of learning and personal growth, constantly seeking knowledge and skills to better herself and her family.

…She’s poor

The stereotype of Filipinas being poor is a generalization that overlooks the diversity of socio-economic backgrounds in the Philippines.

While poverty is a reality for some, many Filipinos are hardworking and resourceful, finding ways to make ends meet and improve their quality of life.

She knows how to make the most of what she has and is grateful for life’s blessings, no matter how big or small. She embodies the Filipino spirit of resilience and positivity in the face of challenges.

Bottomline: Making assumptions about Filipino women dating foreigners is not uncommon, but this shouldn’t be a norm.

Whether it’s about who they marry or how they live, it just isn’t fair to generalize and judge the whole community. Every Filipina has her own unique stories and decisions.

Instead of jumping to conclusions, let’s take the time to get to know each one as an individual.

It’s all about keeping an open mind and showing some respect.

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